As first time moms, even sometimes second time moms, we often don’t know what we should expect from the last few weeks of our pregnancies, let alone our labors and births. So it is completely normal when the partner (or spouse) is clueless as to how to support their significant other who is in labor.
Even if you’ve spent the entire pregnancy supporting her through hyponbirthing, childbirth education classes, maybe even the Bradley method (which involves both parents, prepares the mother to deliver her baby without pain medications and educates the partner in birth coaching techniques), it is still quite common and normal for partners to freeze during labor.
Birth is complex and often unpredictable. No two labors are alike, not even among a woman’s own three children.
I am a big believer in go with the flow, and fill the role that you feel called to.
You may not know what to say, you may not know what to do, but just being there can often be enough.