Beautiful Mom of Twin Girls Expecting a Baby Boy

I remember how Dayna and I met. It's not the way I use to meet mommy clients four years ago, and that's why I love it. It made me reflect on how we evolve as women and as mothers and I wanted to share the entire story behind it with you.

I have been a birth photographer for four years, and I could not even imagine 4 years ago how my career would unravel as my daughters grew and as I delve deeper into the birth world as a birth worker.

Dayna and I met through our local community, our girls (her twins and my almost 6 year old) spent the past year going to VPK together in the best preschool at Kids Academy in Coral Springs, FL. One of her girls and my daughter Kate were in ballet the entire year, and her other day and my niece were in the same VPK classroom together. Through the year we got to know each other as mamas in the same community and build a relationship that I had never imagined I could have with moms! As my girls grew and I changed everything about the way I ran my business, the way I approached our lives as a family of four, I began to develop relationships just like with Dayna, with other birth clients. Dayna was one of my last birth clients before I made the huge leaps and changes that have grown my community and my work to the beautiful, organic, living vessel that it is today.

Three and four years ago, to find birth clients, I'd post my photos on facebook as much as possible, with a 2 year old toddler at home. I rarely had the chance to blog. I rarely had the chance for anything because I had a toddler at home and was a work from home mommy! 

I didn't know my community very well. I had made some mommy friends going to the playgrounds, parks and south Florida beaches with my daughter Kate, but I was so new to the field of birth that I didn't know many doulas or midwives, obgyns or labor and delivery nurses at all. I was just starting to dip my feet into the birth world.

Fast forward four years, so much has changed and I have evolved.

About a year and a half ago, I realized that birth was really my passion.

I also realized I was very overwhelmed.

Trying to balance (keyword trying!!) motherhood to two kids under 5 years old as a stay at home mom, run a household, AND run a full time photography business was leaving me really overwhelmed. 

About one year ago I realized what I had to do. I met Lisa Raynor, my dearest friend and doula here in Coral Springs and in Boca Raton, and she helped me with the final push to bring my career goals to fruition. She told me to try out full time preschool.

I was so nervous about this. I was juggling being a full time stay at home mom to two young kids, a full time job, all my maternity, breastfeeding, newborn and family photography clients in addition to my birth clients, my marriage, my home, and I was so nervous how we would pull off putting two young kids in full time preschool. How could we afford it?

That's when all the big changes fell directly into place.

Let me tell you, it was terrifying.

Change #1: 

I put both of the girls in full time preschool.

It didn't happen over night. I started with only VPK hours for Kate from 9-12pm and Emma was going two days a week from 9am-12pm. Slowly I started adding hours, and then days. By the end of three months, both of my girls were attending preschool from 830am-5pm five days a week.

I cannot tell you how much guilt this brought me. Having been a stay at home mom for almost 5 years while juggling a work from home business, I felt SO guilty that I was putting my kids in full time school. So many mommies can do it both, I told myself. I am so embarrassed and ashamed that I am saying I can't do it, I don't want to do it. 

Over the next 6 - 12 months I would start a healing journey to learn to not compare myself to other mothers, what they do, what their approach towards life and parenting is, and what their life looks like. I would learn that it's not my business to worry about what other mothers and women are capable of, it is only of importance for me to focus on what I want out of my life journey.

Change #2:

I gave up all photo sessions besides birth photography.

This was an absolutely terrifying leap of faith.

Family photo sessions, Maternity and Newborn Photography, and Breastfeeding photoshoots consisted of 50% of my years earnings. 

You might be thinking "and she gave it all up?"

Trust me, I WAS THINKING IT.

Let me tell you why I did this change in my life. I decided that if I was going to be paying for two children to go to full time preschool every week, all of those hours at home while they were at school would be dedicated to focusing 110% on my birth clients and my birth photography and birth films. This is after all, my passion, I realized. And the investment I make on the BEST preschool in Coral Springs needs to pay off on me investing all of my time and energy into growing my relationships with my birth clients everyday, every week, every month.

Trust me, I still love all the other sessions I use to do. And it broke my heart when I had so many families reaching out to me after I had slowly started my transition, asking for family sessions, breastfeeding sessions, and I had to turn them away and recommend one of my colleagues.

But as the weeks and months passed, I started realizing that I had made the best decision I ever could have. I went from juggling 120 families every 12 months to working intimately with 24 families. I got to really know every single birth family I was working with, I would remember hubby's name as I walked into labor and delivery. I'd remember that older brother was about to turn 3 years old next month. I'd remember that they just got a new puppy. These details (and many more intimate details ranging from fertility issues, loss, difficult pregnancies) became so vital to me to learn and remember. I realized in the past year that my true passion is not necessarily in birth photography. Rather my true passion is supporting, educating and empowering the women I work with, and building my relationship with them.

The change I had implemented thrust my business into a whole different world that I had never known before. I started having more time to dedicate to things I had never had a chance to even do. I started blogging. I LOVE writing. I've been a writer since I was in elementary school, I wrote my first book when I was 8. Being able to pour my soul into something I am so passionate about made my career so much more dynamic and fulfilling.

I finally had the time to network.

I have met so many absolutely phenomenal astonishing individuals in my community in the past twelve months, I did not even know these incredible human beings and specialists in the birth world existed, and now I have such an esteemed honor of calling them my friends. In the past 12 months I have deepened my relationship with Lisa Raynor, my doula soul sister, I met Martha Lerner, owner of Zenmamalove.com who my maternity/newborn/family photo clients from the past had boasted about for years, I got to meet the most amazing expert in the fertility world, Dr. Scott Roseff of IVFMD, who has a heart of gold by the way and works so closely with women and their partners/spouses to build healthy new families.

I had the privilege of building a close relationship with my favorite birth providers in the birth world ranging from Nurse midwives to OBGYNS to licensed midwives. I learned about baby nurses and how crucial they are to the family in the 4th trimester through meeting and growing close friendship with Mercedes Cabrisas, owner of South Florida Baby Nurse and Jennifer Shapiro, owner of Blissful Baby Nurse and Newborn Services.

I met Jackie Polsky, of South Florida Psychologist Associates, specializing in the post partum mama, Natasha Chamely, owner of Baby Love Spa  in Margate, FL, it was such a pleasure to meet and become friends with the amazing Susan Winograd, who owns Pelvic Rehab.com and works closely with post partum mommies and the entire family, as well as Dr. Moshe Winograd, who is a phenomenal post partum and loss psychologist at Coastal Behavioral Health, and became friends with Carly Tokar (Tokar Family Chiropractic) and Gena Bofshever (Dr. Gena Chiropractor). I got to experience first hand chiropractic care through Dr. Elaina Gill, post partum physical therapy from the amazing Dr. Kathleen Vigo of Painless Pregnancy, and Laura Knecht of Good Little Sleeperzzz helped my toddler and now almost 6 year old finally get on the right routine for a proper bedtime (south Florida's BEST pediatric sleep consultant!)

I've also had the immense opportunity to work with the amazing doulas at the Orchid's Nest, the phenomenal labor and delivery staff at Boca Raton Regional Hospital. I had the pleasure of meeting and growing a wonderful partnership with the OBGYN team at Omega Women's Care. 

It's just been an unreal year.

I cannot believe that my closest friends are all in the same birth world that once was a lonely place, now is filled with the same amazing faces I see but in and outside of work. 

Why Every Pregnant Woman should consider a Midwife for her Birth

The first time I attended a hospital birth with a midwife I was very surprised what I saw. I had attended so many births with OBGYNs that I almost wasn't sure what a Midwife does.

Midwife Christine Hackshaw of Midwifery Women's Care, applying pressure to first time mom Emily's lower back during a contraction.

Last March, I hosted a "Match Your Midwife" event at the Women's Center at Boca Raton Regional Hospital. Midwife Courtney McMillian from Boca Midwifery spoke about the different kinds of midwives that there are.

For hospital births, there are two types of midwives:

Nurse-midwives, who are educated and licensed as nurses first, then complete additional education in midwifery. They are known as Certified Nurse-Midwives (CNMs). CNMs are licensed to practice in all 50 states. They are usually licensed in individual states as Nurse Practitioners (NPs).(source) 

The other type of midwife is known as a Direct-entry midwife. They are educated or trained as midwives without having to become nurses first. They may be Certified Professional Midwives (CPMs) or Certified Midwives (CMs). (source) 

Direct-entry midwives are trained to provide the Midwives Model of Care to healthy women and newborns primarily in out-of-hospital settings. They do not have nursing education as a prerequisite for midwifery education. (source)

Certified Midwife (CM): Certified Midwives are individuals who have or receive a background in a health related field other than nursing, then graduate from a masters level midwifery education program. They have similar training to CNMs, conform to the same standards as CNMs, but are not required to have the nursing component.

Certified Professional Midwife (CPM): The vast majority of direct-entry midwives in the United States are Certified Professional Midwives. The CPM is the only midwifery credential that requires knowledge about and experience in out-of-hospital settings. Their education and clinical training focuses on providing midwifery model care in homes and freestanding birth centers. In some states, CPMs may also practice in clinics and doctors offices providing well-woman and maternity care.

What I learned and observed at my very first birth with a midwife was that most women who choose a midwife for their prenatal care, labor and delivery are looking to have a less medical intervention approach to their entire prenatal and birthing experience.

Midwives generally work with low risk pregnancies, but they also can serve as a woman's gynecologist. As an example, I see a midwife as my gynecologist. Midwives also work with their patients regarding family planning, monitoring pregnancy, labor and delivery, postpartum and newborn care. But they do so much more than that. Many of our local midwives in Boca Raton in addition to obstetrics and gynecology, also care for women in the fields of menopause, adolescence and teenager care.

At births, often times I will see a midwife help with the delivery of baby for mom, help with the delivery of the placenta, the cutting of the cord and any stitches mom may need in the case of tearing, and then help mom get baby latched on for breastfeeding.

What I have seen from the distance as a birth photographer on my client's birth team, sometimes in the case that a pregnancy (or a labor) may become high-risk, an OBGYN who works closely with the midwife will step in to assist with prenatal care or in the case of birth, to assist in the delivery of the baby. However, depending on the practice, I have seen midwives (such as Midwifery Women's Care and Boca Midwifery) successfully helping mommies with vbacs (vaginal birth after c-section) and I even recently attended a vba2c (vaginal birth after two c-sections) with Courtney McMillian at Boca Midwifery. 

In the case of a cesarean section, OB doctors will step in to do the surgery. What I personally have loved about working with Boca Midwifery when it comes to a mom needing a c-section is that their midwives tend to attend the csections in the operating room for their own patients who they have seen throughout their pregnancy who may have become high-risk due to a developed medical issue in pregnancy, or if they needed a cesarean during labor. For me this is everything. I am a huge proponent of supporting birthing women in all stages of their journey, and to have the midwife who you've trusted your entire pregnancy journey, go with you into the operating room when your birth unexpectedly calls for it, means everything. So much fear fades and so much trust grows in its place. 

When working with an OBGYN, I have personally experienced them typically heading to the hospital (they are usually about 5-15 minutes from the hospital here in Boca Raton) when the nurses update them that the mom is around 8 - 9 centimeters dilated. They usually arrive and wait for mom to get to 10 centimeters dilated and then help mom with pushing. I have seen this common practice at most hospitals throughout south Florida from Miramar/Pembroke Pines all the way through Jupiter, FL. Even in the case where generations of women have used a specific OB (mom, daughter), I cannot recall a single birth in one month shy of four years of birth photography where an OBGYN came and sat with a mom for 4-6 hours of her active labor prior to delivery, (with the exception of retired OBGYNS who are the fathers of my laboring client, attending their birth as a support part of their birth team, not as the delivering OB).

And so why does this matter, when your provider gets to your laboring? Read on...

Many first time moms (and even second and third time moms) will be in labor anywhere from 10 - 24 hours). And you only get to 10 centimeters dilated at the very tail end of that labor process. The first few hours may be manageable, but once things pick up, many women find themselves needing pain management techniques as well as someone to keep them focused, empowered and encouraged.

So it is not ideal to only rely on your OBGYN and labor and delivery nurses for support and encouragement, as they will not be spending 90% of your earlier labor with you. I do not say that to dissuade you from using an OBGYN for pregnancy and delivery though. As there are many benefits and pros of using and staying with an OBGYN. I personally used an OBGYN for the first 20 weeks of my second pregnancy (Dr. Jane Rudolph from Women's Health Partners off of SW 18th Street in Boca Raton, FL) and I absolutely adored every waking minute of my time spent during prenatal visits with her. She was patient, kind, incredibly sweet and warm and compassionate. She'd take the time to ask about my questions and concerns and go through them all. She spoke to me on a personal level about her own kids and pregnancy journeys. She'd end every visit with an exceptionally warm and tight hug. I trusted her completely and felt so warm and safe under her care. And staying under that type of care for a woman's entire pregnancy is definitely an incredible plus. However, it is important to consider what is your individual need for labor support. For women who know they will need a professional who is well educated on pregnancy, labor, birth and post partum to be at their side through labor, who will not have to run off because they are working with other patients (as labor and delivery nurses are often called to do), a highly hospital natural birth experienced labor doula maybe an important consideration. I encourage moms to make a list of their personal needs and expectations for their pregnancy, their labor, their post partum, and evaluate if a labor doula, a midwife, a post partum doula or a registered baby nurse could fit in those needs.

In contrast, in my personal experience having worked with a few hospital midwives, I have witnessed midwives from Boca Midwifery (Courtney McMillian and Polina Goldenberg) and Laurie Gibbons from Women's Health Partners, Kathy Fair and Christine Hackshaw from Midwifery Women's Care and Kathleen Philbin from Select Women's Healthcare sitting for hours with mom, often times on the foot of her bed, sharing positive words of support, advice on how to breathe through contractions, suggestions on position changes to alleviate some pressure / getting baby in a better position, and I have often times seen these midwives provide touch-support to mom. Touch support I would say can range anywhere from applying pressure to the hips or lower back during contractions to running fingers along mom's arms and shoulders along with light pressure for a soft massage. And even applying cold compresses to mom's neck and forehead. This form of extensive support during active labor and end stages of labor can be so crucial and encouraging to laboring moms. 

(all of the above midwives deliver at Boca Raton Regional Hospital in Boca Raton, FL (off of I-95 and Glades Road in East Boca) which is my favorite hospital to work in as a birth photographer but also as a mother with the exception of Kathleen Philbin who works up north at Good Samaritan Medical Center in West Palm Beach, FL) 

Below, you'll find a list of questions to ask a midwife or OBGYN during your first consultation with them to make sure they are the right provider to suit your personal needs and expectations, as well as questions to ask closer to the third trimester. If you'd like to go to a page where you can more easily print them, click here.

MIDWIFE/OBGYN CONSULTATION INTERVIEW QUESTIONS

INITIAL CONSULTATION

1. To Yourself: Do you feel supported, respected, do they listen and answer your questions patiently?

2. Are they open to birth plans? What if you have a birth preferences list?

3. What hospitals do they have privileges at?

4. How many vaginal checks do they do during pregnancy and during labor? Should I get them, how necessary are they, what are the benefits/downsides and when do I need to have them done?

5. Under what circumstances during pregnancy would you recommend an induction? How can an induction affect the outcome of my birth (vaginal / cesarean) What type of inductions do you do?

6. What is your opinion of doulas? What percentage of your patients use a doula? What doulas do you recommend?

7. Under what circumstances during labor would you recommend to administer medications such as cervidil or pitocin?

8. How do you handle past due dates? (Over 40 weeks, over 41 weeks)

9. What is your percentage of your patients get an epidural, What percentage have vaginal births? / percentage of c-sections? Under what circumstances during pregnancy would you recommend a scheduled cesarean?

10. Who is your backup Midwife or OB? Who is the OB covering doctor? How is he/she during labor? When can I meet them?

11. What are your feelings about delayed cord clamping? How long do you delay for? Can you do cord blood banking AND delayed cord clamping?

12. Are you planning any vacations, trips, major surgeries, or other events 3-4 weeks before my due date, or up to 2 weeks after my due date that would interfere with your attendance at the birth?

What positions do you feel comfortable delivering in? (on back, squatting (using a squat bar), on all fours (knees and elbows)?

13. Is your practice VBAC friendly?

CLOSER TO THIRD TRIMESTER

1. What are your feelings on the dad catching the baby, or me catching my own baby? Will you deliver the baby? Or will you assist me in birthing him/her/them?

2. How do you feel about hypnobirthing? Are you experienced with delivering babies for moms who are using hypnobirthing?

3. How does it work if I am GBS positive - how often do you administer antibiotics during labor and do you do specific procedures with the baby after birth

4. Do you do IV/Heplock? Are you ok with laboring tubs, (or hydrotherapy by standing in the hospital shower), eating small snacks during labor?

5. What are the pros and cons of vitamin K shot and eye ointment

6. Do you offer or suggest taking specific childbirth preparation courses?

7. During labor, how close together should my contractions be before I head to the hospital?

8. If my water breaks before labor (contractions) even begins, how long can I labor at home for before I am required to go to the hospital?

9. What happens in the event of pre-term labor before 38 weeks?

10. Under what circumstances, if any, do you perform episiotomies? Do you recommend doing perineum massages throughout pregnancy leading up to birth?

11. How long will you and/or your support team stay with mom and baby after the birth?

12. Is breastfeeding support offered?

13. Do you deliver breech? [Most babies will move into delivery position a few weeks prior to birth, with the head moving closer to the birth canal. When this fails to happen, the baby's buttocks and/or feet will be positioned to be delivered first. This is referred to as “breech presentation.”] Do you recommend trying to turn the baby if the baby is in breech position during labor or in the last few weeks of pregnancy or do you recommend a cesarean birth?

Birth of a Second Baby Boy! | Boca Raton Regional Hospital

I met this extraordinary mom when we were both pregnant a couple of years ago.

Our friendship and connection through our previous pregnancies together made it so special when she and her husband reached out to me to capture the birth of their second son. 

Tears welled up in my eyes when I sat with this sweet family talking about their hopes and dreams for meeting their second little boy. It moved me so much to see how excited (and a little nervous) they were, but most of all, you could see the love in their eyes, their faces, the way they looked at each other in eagerness and joy. 

And it made me so happy to hear that they would be meeting their little boy at my favorite hospital in Florida (Boca Raton Regional Hospital) with one of my favorite practices too - Women's Health Partners.

I cannot wait for you to view and enjoy the images from this incredibly sweet and beautiful birth story below. I hope you love them as much as I do!

Big Sisters & Their Newborn Baby - Birth Story in Florida

As a birth photographer and birth videographer in Boca Raton, Florida, I feel so honored and blessed to be able to witness while documenting, the most intimate, precious moments between big siblings meeting the little person they have been waiting to meet during their mom's whole pregnancy.

I'm not sure what is sweeter and more moving, whether the bond between mom & baby or watching a mom as she gazes on her older child meeting the baby for the first time...

In that moment, mom's 'baby' is no longer the youngest, she watches this magical transition into the 'big sibling role' as the older child says "hello" for the first time to their new baby sibling.

It is so sweet to watch as these big siblings automatically and naturally as if born with an innate maternal instinct, immediately love on this new little person. 

I hope you enjoy this 'meeting story' of these big sisters meeting their darling baby sister Ainhoa, for the first time. 

I only take two - three families for birth stories each month in Broward and Palm Beach counties, and reserve their birth stories several months into their pregnancies. I do travel for birth stories as well to Naples and Tampa, Key West, and even northern Florida. I will travel out of the state of Florida - and have had birth clients in New York and Washington State and even abroad for certain birth stories (inquire for details).

If you are expecting and would like to hire me for your birth story, it is never too late to get in touch with me. Birth is unpredictable and sometimes plans do change and babies are born early and I may have an opening last minute, as I did with this special family in south Florida.